CUSTOMER OF THE NIGHT: 9/18: Do I Look Like F...ING Penn & Teller, *expletive deleted* hole?

Seriously, I've seen people try to utilize 3-D effects on a regular
television before. It barely works. There's really no point in even
calling cause you're watching the film in 2-D either way.

Tonight at work was one of the best nights I've had at work in a very long time. My co-worker and I had hardly ANY customers, but still had WONDERFUL sales numbers and were able to have fascinating conversations by the end of the night, everything from why Paris Hilton takes over all media, to the collapse of the family unit in society, to the importance of in depth character development in a screenplay.

It takes a very special phonecall from a very special customer to make the night any more memorable than it already was, but boy did I get it.

1 hour before we close....this is about 11:00 mind you...I get a phonecall from a gentleman.

"Thank you for calling Blockbuster Video in ****, this is David speaking, how can I help you?"

"Yeah, I think you guys *expletive deleted* up, um, I rented this movie Spy Kids 3-D for my kids tonight and they're sitting down to watch it and there's no 3-D glasses inside for them to watch it."

"No sir, that's not a mistake, we don't rent it with the 3-D glasses."

"Why in the hell not?"

"Because we know for a fact we'll have customers that won't return them and we'll be out in the investment. The disk is double-sided. If you flip it over, you can watch the film in 2-D."

"I Don't want to *expletive deleted* watch it in 2-D! My kids rented the god damn movie to watch it in 3-D with the god damn 3-D glasses in the box!"

"I'm sorry sir, you can only get the glasses if you purchase the film. If you return the film, I'll credit you for it and you can get something else."

"Are you paying attention to me, you're missing the point entirely: I. DON'T. WANT. ANOTHER. *expletive deleted*. MOVIE. I WANT THE MOTHER *expletive deleted* GLASSES SO MY KIDS CAN WATCH THIS MOVIE IN 3-D! IF I COME DOWN TO THE STORE, YOU'RE GONNA GIVE ME THE *expletive deleted* GLASSES RIGHT?"

"Unfortunately sir, I don't have the glasses. We don't even have a pair back here I could give you. We don't have a pair that we rent out to people and I have no idea where to obtain a pair for you to watch the movie with without you actually purchasing the film."

"YOU LISTEN TO ME YOU MOTHER *expletive deleted* *expletive deleted* HOLE *expletive deleted*. MY KIDS...MY CHILDREN...MY CHILDREN THAT I'D KILL FOR...ARE SITTING ON THE COUCH IN THERE CRYING THEIR LITTLE EYES OUT BECAUSE THEY CAN'T WATCH THIS MOVIE IN 3-D! THEY WERE SO EXCITED ABOUT THE 3-D AND YOU JUST BROKE THEIR HEARTS...GIVE ME ONE....ONE *expletive deleted* REASON I SHOULDN'T COME DOWN TO THE STORE AND BREAK YOUR NECK."

"I am....really...really sorry sir, if I had any possible way of obtaining you the 3-D glasses for the movie, I would personally drive to your house and hand them to you. But there is absolutely nothing I can tell you except that if you return the movie to the store, we'll give you every cent of your money back. I'm really incredibly sorry we've upset your children. I REALLY, TRULY AM....I...."

He hung up on me.

Who do I look like? Penn and Teller? Does the guy think I can suddenly materialize 3-D glasses in my hands? Whoops, here you go! Silly me!

And second of all....


WHY ARE YOUR KIDS UP AT 11:00 AT NIGHT WATCHING A GOD DAMN MOVIE?