CUSTOMER OF THE NIGHT: 9/24: Dora the Explorer's Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

Who looks at this DVD cover and says, "Gee, I
Should Rent This for my kids?"

This woman....my GOD, I think people are just trying to find excuses to yell at us at this point.

So the phone rings.

"Thank You For Calling Blockbuster Video in ****, this is David Speaking, how can I help you?"

I'm greeted by an older woman who appears to be both angry and seething with tears at the same time "YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU."

I could already tell this was going to be bad.

She continued. She was literally so incredibly mad she dragged out every word of her sentences in such a breathy voice. "You sick bastard...what do you have against children."

I have absolutely everything against children, but I thought it best not to say anything.

She continued. I was in earlier today, in your store, with my CHILDREN.

She paused.

I say "And? Did I do something?"

"DID YOU DO SOMETHING? I was out in your store letting my children pick out movies...and they bring up a movie to me, and I didn't know what it was, but they REALLY wanted to see it, so I took it up to the counter and you RENTED this to me."

"Okay..."

"So I'm in the van, we're going on this long car trip down to florida as a family on a LONG NEEDED VACATION. So I pop the movie in the DVD player, and the kids are all excited, and all of the sudden, I hear these SCREAMS AND CRYING FROM THE BACKSEAT!"

"Um..."

"IS THIS SOME KIND OF HORRIBLE SICK JOKE! WHY DID YOU RENT THAT TO MY KIDS? MY CHILDREN WILL NOW REQUIRE DECADES OF THERAPY TO RECOVER FROM WHAT THEY SAW, YOU RUINED OUR VACATION! WE HAD TO TURN AROUND AND GO HOME! NOW WE'LL NEVER GO TO FLORIDA! AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT! ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?"

"Miss, what movie is this?"

"I have to find it, hold on..."

She finds it.

"It's called Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas."

"Miss, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas isn't a movie for kids."

"Well, THANKS for telling me that now! How was I supposed to know this."

"Miss, if you had looked at the back, the film is a very strong R-Rating, for disturbing images and drug use, among many other things."

"THAT'S NOT MY JOB!"

"Excuse me?"

"Look, my kids just brought this movie up to me and they said they wanted to see it so I got it for them. You didn't say ONE word to me about it. It is ENTIRELY YOUR responsibility to inform me this movie is inappropriate to show my kids! You are supposed to be a family oriented company you liars!"

"Miss, there were other family oriented titles in the stack. I assumed those were for the kids. I couldn't possibly see you renting a movie titled Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas for little kids? I mean, read the back of the box...I'm very sorry, but had you taken one second to read the description on the back, you would have known without even checking the rating you shouldn't show that to kids."

"IT IS NOT! DID YOU HEAR ME? IT IS NOT! MY JOB TO FIND THESE THINGS OUT! IT IS YOUR JOB, AS THE EMPLOYEE TO INFORM ME? HOW DOES YOUR COMPANY PLAN TO COMPENSATE ME FOR THE YEARS OF THERAPY MY CHILDREN ARE GOING TO NEED?"


Christ, lady. Look at the box, would you buy absolutely anything for your kids just because they tell you they want it without finding out what the stupid movie is ABOUT first?